Pearl of Wisdom

'A strong person is not one who overcomes people, but a strong person is one who overcomes his own self.'

Prophet Muhammad al-Mustafa [sawa]
Tanbih al-Khawatir, v. 2, p. 10

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Question : #1180 Category: Family Issues
Subject: Cutting family relationship
Question: Assalamualaikum,

I would like to cut relationship with my family. That includes mother and four sisters.

All my life, I have worked for them. I bring two sisters to Australia for study, I paid their tuition fees, I provide finance to do hajj, I organised both socially and financially to get my three sisters married, I am providing monthly expense to my mum for last 13 years. I am even building a house back in my home country for my mother.

The reason for me telling those is after all those years of effort; I am still outside my family relationship. My mum always thinks of my sister and their kids. I have my wife and child. She does not care about them.

While I went to my home country and organised my youngest sister marriage in May this year, I had some argument with my family. Nothing major. And I did not get into direct argument with them. But all of them stopped talking to me since then.

I am so depressed and sad now. I got very good observation skill and I realised by years of observation, activity and response, I am the least important person in my family. They don’t share anything with me. They only contact me whenever something is required.

I have done some research on Muslims cutting relationship with family. And all those research shows not to do that. But I am in lowest point of my life thinking about this all the time about how they treating me. I have even spoken to all my family members about what issues they have and discuss in lengths so many times to resolve any dispute. After years of doing these, my family attitude remains the same. My mum actions speaks that I am living good life and all her daughters struggling in life.

Please help me.
Answer:

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